Day Two: You Are Not An Accident

Point to Ponder: I am not an accident.

Question to Consider: I know that God uniquely created me. What areas of my personality, background, and physical appearance am I struggling to accept?

Part of my personality that I am struggling to accept is my shyness. People may not think I am shy but I really am. I try to hide it all the time. If you ever see a big grin on my face then that side is coming out. Sometimes I force myself to say things to suppress the shyness. I want to be able to just get up in front of people and say things without shaking and my voice going in and out. Other than that I like my personality. I like to please those around me (to a certain extent). If I know it will make someone smile then I am willing to do it. Another part of my personality that I am struggling with is second guessing myself. When I second guess myself in the end I wish I would have did what I second guessed. So I feel I lack the confidence that I should have. Again, sometimes I just have to push/force myself to just do it.

Part of my background that I am struggling to accept is my family. I seem so much different from them. It's like I am the one who sticks out and is different. But who am I to say, they may feel the same way. But I don't think I get the full support I need from the beginning. I have to just go ahead and do it and when something good comes from it is when the support comes in. I tell myself that where I started doesn't matter but where I end up. I try not to let that get to me but once in a while it does.

I love my physical appearance. Once in a while I don't like my stomach but it's because I like to eat. So my tummy is something I did to myself (lol), so I can't complain. I accept everything else. I love it.

But thinking of the point to ponder I guess it's all for a reason. It doesn't make complete sense to me now but it will. What's going through my mind is where I came from will probably help someone else get through.