Thursday, December 31, 2009

My New Year's Resolution

it's easy to get the I-don't-deserve-God attitude and the I-can-live-without-the good-things-of-God attitude. With that attitude we start to settle for less and not get the good things that God has promised to us. Even though we mess up we have to realize it, own it then pray to God for help. Don't wait until you get too deep where you're at an all-time low. That's where desperation comes in at. You can save yourself from that.

I write about this subject AGAIN because owning something is not easy at all. Speaking for myself, I don't want to be a person filled with sin. I'll be on the straight path and then when I mess up I remove myself from the promise. Then the cycle starts.

With that said, my New Year's Resolution is to realize my flaws and weak areas, OWN THEM and pray to God to help me. I don't want anything fancy because by owning my mistakes I can become a better me to help others. I don't want to help others if I am not straight myself.

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

New Year's Vent

Eveyone keeps talking about their New Year's Resolution and they're all the same. Cliche things get to me, like really gets to me. Everyone says they are going to let people go and erase numbers and blah blah blah.Why do you have to wait for a new year to take action. uugggghhhh

I/We Have To Put In Work

We had the Grand Opening of our church. It's been in existence for a very long time but we just opened our new sanctuary in our fairly new location. It is so beautiful. I am still amazed because a handful of out faithful members put it together. I am not just talking about a little work here and there but literally the whole project. From plumbing, electrical, flooring etc. The whole works.

Our step group stepped and I noticed that stepping for my church isn't the same as stepping for my school, totally different. When I step for each the adrenaline rush is so different. For school the rush is more of I am so ready to do this and for church it is more hesitant. Also when I step for my school when I mess up I quickly catch myself and continue on. I am nervous but I can think clearly and execute the steps to near perfection. But for church, the nervousness takes over and everything flies out the window. I wonder why that is. It's so weird. I guess I have to put in more work. But the piece sounded really great.

As the service went on though the preacher preached a nice sermon. It was based on be accountable for what is given to our church. Since God is taking us to the next level by expanding our church we have to do something with it and go up to the next level. Then he touched on us all moving together and listening to God and if we mess up just to put it in God's hands because He will be there with us the whole way.

Saturday, December 26, 2009


No lie, I let people get the best of me. I try my hardest not to get upset and unleash my attitude and just let things flow but some way some how it always finds its way out. I feel I have pretty good judgement, knowledge and common sense to know what is right and what it wrong in what I am placed over but another person may see it in a totally different light. And that keeps me from stretching out as far as I can. When I feel I've made progress and that we've moved our relationship up there, they do what they do to make me tick. Uuurrrrrgggghhhhhh! And then the giving up comes in. When I push, they pull.

I am working toward being humble and meek as a leader but not too passive or too weak. There is a very fine line. I guess when I feel like there is no authority where there should be is where the change in attitude comes in. I don't know. All I know is I am tired! You get the point.

People are difficult. That's probably why I stayed away from them in the first place. But they say in God's house you have to mingle.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Those Who Remain

Most Sundays give me strength. Last Sunday, the Minister definitely brought the Word. She was specking so much truth too. The title of her sermon was , "Those Who Remain." It comes from the scripture of 1 Thessalonians 4:17 ("Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.").

It was very motivational. She talked about how she wanted to give up on Christ and such. And of course, we've all been there. She told us to hold on to the end because if we wanted to go with God at the end of this life, we have to stay alive and remain with the Lord. This meant that we have to be alive and kicking in our spiritual lives and have stayed with the Lord through everything.

She also reminded us that in this walk it isn't going to be easy and we know that. So we should not be surprised when hardships come our way. Putting that alone into our minds can probably put it at ease a bit. When we go through whatever it is we are going through we have to say to ourselves that this is what this walk is all about. We have to be strong!

Just pick yourself back up and stay in the Lord.

Friday, December 4, 2009


Today, I seen the movie "The Shawshank Redemption." It is a movie about a man who is wrongfully convicted and sent to prison. He was a really intelligent man when it came to numbers, accounting and things of that sort. So the warden and other officers in the prison used him for things of that nature. After a while the man was using the prison itself as a way to launder money for the warden. But the man out-smarted the warden and me too! Hours after watching the movie is where the pieces are coming in at.

At the beginning of the movie, the convict gets a rock hammer because he loved to sculpt rocks. Then he noticed how weak the walls were. So he tunneled his way out. Out of nineteen years he was able to hide his rock hammer in the pages of his Bible (cut out the pages) from room searches by the prison guards. The warden was there and took such an interest to him because he had a Bible in his hand. The warden began to question him about the Bible and quoted a few scriptures himself.

As the convict finishes us his escape route out of prison, he switches the accounting book where the warden kept his dirty numbers with the Bible he hid the rock hammer in and wrote a note. The convict was very slick with that and it has me wondering. Never in the movie did the warden open the Bible. The very same Bible he said he lived by and would be a friend to the newly convicted. At first, I liked the warden because he loved the Bible and he quoted a few scriptures here and there. But as the movie played he was so mean and corrupt and I thought how could someone quoting scriptures be so evil. But as I think in the scenes where there was a Bible present, he never turned a single page. If he did, he could of kept up with his dirty secrets.

People talk the talk of being a Christian and they may be able to walk it a bit. But do not be deceived.